How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

Eizabeth Barrett Brown

Dear Daughters,

The quality of everything in our lives stems from the love we feel (or don’t feel) for ourselves. Mindset, health, relationships, work…everything.

So this year, my number one goal is to love my whole self–without conditions–every day.

Because, as Brene Brown says,

We are worthy now. Not if. Not when. We are worthy of love and belonging now. Right this minute. As is.

One of the first steps I’ve taken to “manifest this goal” is to create a list of concrete things I love about me. I decided I needed specifics because abstract self love is undefined and can be easily dissmissed.

Here’s how I went about it.

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Steps for Writing a Self Love List

Grab a pen and paper. Sit down somewhere peaceful. Close your eyes and begin slow inhales and exhales.

On your exhales, release your negative energy. Visualize it flowing away from you.

On your inhales, breathe in nourishing energy. Visualize it filling you up.

Next, slowly repeat the following words five times…or more. “I am love. I am worthy of love. I love myself.” Repeat them until you feel them.

Then, give yourself a gentle hug and hold it for a count of thirty. After you release, open your eyes, pick up your pen, and complete these sentences in your mind then capture them on paper.

I love my___.

I love how I____.

I love that I am a___.

Here’s my list.

Seven Things I Love About Me

Quirky, Raunchy Sense of Humor

I love my quirky, raunchy, inapproropriate sense of humor and the secret/not-so-secret fact that I laugh my butt off inside because I think I’m hilarious and because life often presents itself to me as a series of comedic vingettes. I’m frequently snort laughing before anyone else joins in…or doesn’t. It never bothers me if I’m the only one rolling with mirth. Their loss. I want to laugh through this life as as often as possible.

Word Nerd

I love that I am a ginormous word nerd. I love reading words. I love writing words. I love discovering or rediscovering archaic, flashy, highbrow, nonsensical, urban, forgotten words. I keep a running list titled, “Don’t forget about these cool words.” Vainglorious. Loquacious. Durryface. Nascent. Mmm…so, so good!

Superior Eye/Hand Coordination

I love that I have superior eye/hand coordination. I know my pride stems from pre Title IX days when boys insisted girls sucked at sports. I did not suck. I did not pretend to suck. Nope, I kicked their boy butts at every opportunity. Still feel massive glee when I crush yet another unsuspecting male victim on the tennis court or the ping-pong table.

Cute Ears

I love my ears. They are smallish and lie flat against my head and neck. My lobes are petite and uniform in size. I love that I’ve never accidentally combed them. They are one of my favorite body parts. I keep them in pristine condition because wax growing outside of the ear is horrifying. I vow it will never happen to me!

Empathetic

I love how I strive to understand what other people are experiencing and feeling. Empathy is the foundation for compassion, connection, and unity. It’s the world I wish to create, to live in, and the world I want for you and your daughters. Your Nana was highly empathetic, and I’m sure you’ll agree it was one of the most beautiful things about her. Thank you for role modeling the way, Mom.

Daredevil

I love that I’m a daredevil and that I seek the adrendaline rush of doing something scary and surviving it! Skydiving, drag racing, crazy rollercoasters, wielding a machette sized knife in the kitchen, leaping into impulsive love, pulbishing my thoughts….What’s next, baby? Wahoo!

Learned How to Cry

I love how I’ve learned to cry without shame. That I now truly believe that to weep means to be honest and fierce, not fragile and powerless. I love that I struggled and overcame my bias. That I practiced and practiced and practiced embracing my tears so I could release my sorrow, rather then bully myself into supressing it. This was/is a massive emotional victory.

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The goal of creating a self love list is to become comfortable with consciously acknowledging and embracing our beautiful selves. But wow! Writing this short list was way more difficult than I thought it would be. Getting specific felt like pulling teeth and that tells me a lot. Coming up with multiple items? Also, super hard. But…I persevered. And, like with most things, next time I write the list it will be easier. And the time after that. And so on.

Daughters. Make 2022 a year of self love. Write your own lists today. Keep them updated by adding new attributes on a regular basis. Post the lists. Read each verse like a daily love affirmation.

All my love.

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Like this blog post on Self Love? Check out “How To Create A Storyboard of Who You Want To Be!”